Cut The Crap

There has been a growing medical trend in America, concerning the general healthiness of middleaged adults. It's not a new trendy diet, nor a quick-fix-tummy-tuck program--and unlike those fads, this passing trend will hopefully be around a lot longer. While the procedure is a little invasive, the results are paramount to the immediate discomfort. I'm talking of course, about colonoscopies, that quick shot of revitalization that just lets all your troubles run away. There is volumes of research supporting the notion of this annual anal-clensing. Including countless celebrity endorsements. The major trend-a-lites of the hollywood scene, who seem to be able to keep with every trend, no matter how big or small, have already jumped on board to the idea of colonoscopies. From movie stars to politicians, even to famous tv journalists and personalites.
Yet despite this new-found concern for internal affairs, there are some people who cannot get behind this movement. What's worse is that some of these people are major figureheads in our nations media, and their faces and personalities are broadcast accross the world--these people are on the frontline of the world's perception of us, and the last thing we need is another uptight, cringy-faced TV personality telling the world what it's doing wrong. The leader of the colonoscopy back-lash is without a doubt Fox News Celebrity Bill O'Rielly--which is a crying shame because there has never been a man more in need of a colonoscopy before. One can tell just watching a few minutes of his talk show, or even reading his words in a newspot that Bill O'rielly if just full of the nasty stuff that makes us all irritable and uptight. Obviously this sour disposition and wildly alarming statements are not necessarily Bill's fault, his distrust in the effectivness in colonoscopy's has had him backed up for years--in fact I'd be willing to bet ole' Billy could use two.
Don't find yourself in the position of these nay-sayers. While, a colonoscopy may not be a terribly comfortable position to be in, the ramifications of such a procedure are obviously positive. What Bill O'Rielly and others like him don't understand is not just how much people will like them more, but how much better they'll feel about themselves. In the end, that's what it's all about. So I say to you Bill O'Rielly: Cut the Crap.